Television: Crowded House, "My Telly's Gone Bung"

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As far as I can tell, no one ever said that these had to be the "best" songs about TV, right? Okay, good. Because the song I've decided to feature is clearly not one of Crowded House's better songs by any stretch, having been written by their least-frequent songwriter, drummer Paul Hester, and released on a collection of previously unreleased odds and ends, Afterglow (released in 2000). Nonetheless, it isn't a bad song either, and it fits the current theme to a "T"(V).

Hester's lyrics about the death of his television ("bung" in this case being an Australian term for "useless") are cutely amusing, but not exactly a cutting indictment of TV culture -- just a mildly self-deprecating tease of those whose lives are probably too tele-centric. Had the song been sped up significantly and given more lyrical bite via a rewrite by Neil Finn, this could have been a song worthy of inclusion on one of their proper studio albums, but as it turned out it's a little ditty that's fun while it lasts, but eminently forgettable afterward. Much like 90% of the programming that gets shown on TV. (Pow! Now we're talkin'!)

My telly's gone bung
What am I to do about the ABC
My telly's gone bung
What am I to do about my predicament
My telly's gone bung
I plugged it it in and it turned me off again 

I've waited up for you
To come alive and bring some truth back to me yeah
'Cause I'm where I wanna be in front of my TV 

My telly's gone bung
What am I to do about Kylie & Jason now
My telly's gone bung
I don't really care for their predicament 

If it was up to me
I'd let these people see
What people do
I've been watching you too

AND BANDS: Sniff 'n' the Tears

Sniff 'n' the Tears: "Driver's Seat"

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There are so many band names including the word "and" that it would be nearly impossible to arbitrarily decide on a good place to jump in here. It would more or less be a matter of closing your eyes and throwing a dart at a dartboard with all the names posted on it. Which actually isn't such a bad idea, but where to find a dartboard that large and the time to print out and cut up all those names . . . well, it just doesn't seem that do-able once you start to think about the logistics.

So instead, I'm approaching this from the angle of the most creative use of the word "and." Not typically a word that is used all that creatively, this narrows it down incredibly. Placement of the word might in fact be creative, such as "And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead," where it's the first word, or some band that has it at the end (can't think of one offhand at the moment).

However, my selection today is the band Sniff 'n' the Tears (yes, of course the "'n'" counts as an "and" as much as, say, an ampersand -- heck, it's "rock 'n' roll," after all). Here, it's used as a bit of a pun, simultaneously conjuring up "Sniff and the Tears" and "Sniffing the Tears" -- pretty clever. And really, a pretty good band name however you look at it. If only their name had carried over to a long and fruitful career -- unfortunately for them, as it turns out, despite the release of a couple more albums, they're a one-hit wonder if ever there was one.

"Driver's Seat" was released in 1979 on the debut Sniff 'n' the Tears album, Fickle Heart, and to this day I hear it frequently on the classic rock stations. And you know what? It's still a great song. The strummed acoustic guitar really makes it pop (and the vocals are pretty cool too). There's a nice guitar solo in there as well, although for some reason I suspect the work of a session musician (but any of you devoted SntT fans should feel free to correct me on that). "Driver's Seat" hit the Top 40 (which I recall well because it was during a time when I was young that I would listen to Casey Kasem every Sunday morning and keep a handwritten list of the songs tacked to my wall, including their chart movements from the previous week), but the original band broke up soon after the album's release and reformed versions never again found any chart success to speak of.

"And" that's that.